2020 feels like a neverending Thursday, November, or 6 pm if that makes any sense to you cuz it surely does to me. I feel like I’ve fallen into a calm, uneventfully routine and I don’t particularly hate it.
It’s peaceful once you unattached from the possibility of death with every sneeze and lose track of everything you’re not allowed to do.
Suddenly you find yourself rewatching your comfort show for the billionth time this year in November with a realization that so many things happened this year and yet you can’t recall one eventful thing worth remembering.
For the last couple of weeks, I’ve been doing the same old stuff like in a loop, searching for that one thing that would break the curse.
Adding hobbies to make my days stand out from the others, only to create a new routine with them. Meeting new people only to let them blend with the others wishing I could live like before corona but with all of the knowledge and growth this year brought.
Every morning I wake up to check some terrible news and get ready for work. I’m one of the few lucky ones that still get to actually go to work and not work in the same place I woke up in.
I put on a regular set of makeup even though I’m wearing a face mask for half of the day and every day I’m complaining about wasting my super expensive makeup for no one to see and yet every morning I continue to do so.
Every day I listen to patients complaining about state restrictions or face masks in general like I’m the one to fix it, while I barely even register wearing mine anymore and I haven’t seen my family in months.
Then I go home in time before the night ban starts, trying to get some groceries in time before everything closes and I repeat the same thing again the next day.
There are rare work-free days that differ from the regular routine.
I go out, do chores, watch something, talk to friends and family, and most recently explore my cooking skills. A new set of routines.
All whilst thinking about the top 3 topics I used to love to write about.
Number one I miss the most is traveling, that’s not happening for obvious reasons.
At the beginning of corona I was so hopefully we’ll be over by the end of the year and I was freely booking trips for the autumn/winter of 2020. Now I’m dubious about booking a trip for autumn/winter 2021.
It’s so nostalgic to browse Skyscanner, Momondo, or Kiwi, my top 3 pages to search for travel trips, these days, and remembering what it was like to just pack yourself and go without a need for hours-long study of rules and restrictions for a given country.
So no more travel posts for me to write about anymore.
Another topic I used to write about regularly were fashion shopping spree reviews or recommendations, obviously sponsored. Of course, I would use the money from affiliates but I don’t feel comfortable doing sponsored posts these days. It’s like “read the room” Who cares about my favorite Macy’s items when we’re in the middle of the pandemic, the economy is crumbling and humanity is divided on almost all of the important issues.
I also loved to write about new shows I watched but I can’t make myself watch anything new now. I much prefer to rewatch old shows and think about the times I watched them for the first time. There is a comfort in no surprises, in knowing what’s going to happen in your favorite show when the reality is simply too uncertain in the moment.
So what do I write about when nothin’s happening?
Nothing and everything.
My super boring life and little distractions and little victories like the awesome cinnamon rolls I made last week and I still can’t stop thinking about them.
I’ll talk about my hopes, dreams and many many thoughts I have about the autumn season just because I need to share them with someone.
I’m sure I’ll tell you about all of the covid tests I’ll have in the future just like I told you about all of the tests I had so far.
Or do I tell you about the time last month when a guy broke up with me because, as he said: he has a dick too small to fuck someone with a fat ass like mine?
Nah, that’s too personal… let’s save all of my crappy dating stories for later.
Right now I’ll cherish the fact that I still have not been touched by covid, nor have my family, I still have my job and regular income and simply being alive and well in this shitshow of a year.